Woman stretching in field of sunflowers.
As they say…"Change your thinking, change your life." We have all had toxic thoughts and often, we don’t even realize when it's happening. Unfortunately, these thoughts become habit, affecting the way we feel about ourselves, and ultimately, the way we live our lives. But, are we stuck in this negative thought cycle? No way!

Jennifer, CEO + Founder of DefineMe Fragrance, began this line to empower girls by helping them replace negative thoughts with positive affirmations. Our fragrances are wearable reminders that us females are capable of anything! We have the power to change our lives, simply by interrupting the toxic thought process and replacing it with some positive self-talk!

Here are 6 common toxic thoughts along with suggested positive replacements and a fragrance recommendation to help inspire more self-love!


 “I am not lovable. No one shows me that they love me.”

Oh, if I had a nickel for every time I thought this after a break up or ending a long-time friendship! So much of what we believe about ourselves is derived from how we think others perceive us. We think, "How can someone that I loved so much, not love me? There must be something wrong with me." We draw the conclusion that we are not lovable.

But, if you were the only person on this planet would you think this way about yourself? You are the person who knows you best and you deserve your love and affection more than anyone! Love yourself first and it will start to rub off on others. Once you realize how amazing you are, you will notice how many others think so too! Knowing that you truly are worthy of love, will give you the strength to kick anyone to the curb that thinks otherwise.

Replace with: "I deserve all the love! First from myself, and the rest will follow."
Fragrance: Audry - She inspires love and is a reminder that love is the answer!  


“If only I was richer, prettier….”

We tend to think that the grass is always greener on the other side. We tell ourselves, "If only I was as pretty as that girl I would be happy," or "If only I was as rich as that guy I would be happy”. But, as the saying goes, “The secret to having it all is knowing you already do!"

Try to live each day with gratitude and be thankful for all the good in your life. Spending too much time wishing you had what others have will make you forget the abundance of things you already have going on in your life. When you stop comparing yourself to others you will realize that you already have everything you need to be happy...and more.

Replace with: "I am grateful for all the good things in my life…I have everything I have ever wanted!"

Fragrance: Clara - She inspires gratitude and is a reminder that there is always something to be grateful for!

“I don’t know what to do with my life.” 

Finding your passion is not an end goal…it’s an endless journey! You should always feel inspired and creative. Your passions should regularly evolve so they don’t grow stale and boring. Get creative, find new hobbies, and try new things! Finding things you love to do can be a huge source of fulfillment. Discovering new and different passions makes life fun and keeps it interesting. Know that this is what life is all about!

So, instead of thinking you don't know what to do with your life, just start living! What are you waiting for?! You are missing all the action and adventure.

Replace with: "I will find inspiration and creativity in new things and I will continue to pursue new passions!"

Fragrance: Delphine - She inspires creativity!

“I’m scared of failing.”

If you never try, you'll never know! We have all been overcome with the fear of failure at one point or another. How many times has fear stopped you from trying something that you later regretted not doing? Well my friends, the only real regrets in life come from the chances you did not take.

Who cares if you go for something and fail? All that matters is that you try your best. Life is full of lessons and sometimes the only way to learn is to fall flat on your face. Life goes on and remembering the times that you failed will only make future victories that much more glorious!

Replace with: "I’m going for it! I will try my best because I am fearless!"  

Fragrance: Harper - She is a reminder that you are fearless and she will awaken your sense of adventure!

“Everything is going wrong, I don’t think I can handle this.”

Well…you’ve made it this far! There have been - and will be - so many situations that feel unbearable, like it’s the end of the world. But here we are! Alive and kickin’. What doesn’t kill us makes us stronger, right?

So yes, things go wrong but it’s not that way forever. Without the lows, we will never feel the highs! We become stronger with each obstacle that we overcome. So, stick it out, you're stronger than you think! The best is yet to come!

Replace with: "I’m a badass! I am capable of anything, I will get through this!"
Fragrance: Payton - She inspires strength!

“I don’t like my body, it’s not good enough.”

YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL! If you feel like you don’t like your body, chances are you are comparing yourself to someone else - and you shouldn't! Everyone’s body is different and that’s okay! Be grateful to have a body that is home to all the things you need to survive…your brain, your heart, your soul! Your body deserves positive thoughts. If you want to see a little improvement in your body give it love and cherish it. Be sure to exercise and get rest… you’ll be surprised how your body repays you!

Replace with: "My body is awesome and keeps me together, literally. I will love and cherish it!"

Fragrance: Sofia Isabel - She is a free-spirit that inspires confidence!

June 09, 2017 — B Social Collaborator

Leave a comment

Please note: comments must be approved before they are published.